Thirukkural with the Times explores real-world lessons from the classic Tamil text ‘Thirukkural’. Written by Tamil poet and philosopher Thiruvalluvar, the Kural consists of 1,330 short couplets of seven words each. This text is divided into three books with teachings on virtue, wealth, and love and is considered one of the great works ever on ethics and morality. The Kural has influenced scholars and leaders across social, political, and philosophical spheres.
Motivational speaker, author and diversity champion Bharathi Bhaskar explores the masterpiece.
For some, fault-finding is not an occasional lapse, it is a way of life. They thrive on pointing fingers, for criticism offers a fleeting sense of control , a feeling of superiority that conceals inner insecurity.
We often speak of Type A and Type B personalities. Type A is the perfectionist, structured, driven, precise. Type B flows with life, flexible, unhurried. To be a Type A person is not your choice, it is how you are made. Yet even for those who notice every flaw , there is a choice in how you point it out.
I learned about this when I was part of the organizing committee of a ten-day workshop. Each day brought new participants and speakers. Amid the bustle, name tags were sometimes printed wrong. My friends and I devised what we called the ‘name tag test’ .
When a name tag was incorrect, some smiled and said, “Not a problem.” There are others who would be wild. One such looked at us frostily and said, “You should be more careful. My name is Sri Priya , not Shri Priya. ”
There are ‘correctors’ all around us. We sometimes learn from them, but often their intent is not to help, but to savour the small thrill of superiority that comes from finding an error.
It reminded me of a meme. The devil was showing a newcomer to hell, the lake of fire and said, “This is the lava you’ll be spending eternity in.”
The newcomer corrected him: “It’s magma. Lava is molten rock that erupted on the earth’s surface, magma is beneath it. We’re underground, so it’s magma.”
The devil sighed, “This is why you’re here, you realize?”
Correct a mistake, if you must. But be gentle. Instead of telling people they were wrong, Greek philosopher Socrates asked questions that led them to realize it themselves. This Socratic method preserved dignity while revealing truth.
Thiruvalluvar, who lived perhaps around the same time, offered something even nobler:
“ Atram maraikkum perumai; sirumaidhan
kutrame koori vidum.”
The great overlook the faults of others; the
Petty delight in pointing them out.
This truth echoes in our epics too. One episode from Kambaramayanam still melts my heart.
At Sita’s insistence, Rama sets out to capture the magical golden deer, despite Lakshmana’s warning. When the demon, disguised as the deer, falls to Rama’s arrow, it screams in Rama’s voice, “Hey Lakshmana! Hey Sita!”
Terrified, Sita pleads with her brother-in-law to go save Rama. Lakshmana refuses to leave her alone. In her panic, Sita loses reason and utters something unthinkable: “Your brother is in danger, and you still wish to remain here by my side?”
When Rama had slain the deer and saw Lakshmana, he asked why Sita was left alone. Lakshmana did not speak of the cruel words hurled at him by the very person he revered as a mother. He merely bowed his head and said softly that Sita was terrified, and so he came.
Not once did he speak of her accusation. The words that had wounded him so deeply remained buried within him, sealed by affection and restraint.
Later, when Sita sat imprisoned in Lanka, she wept in remorse. She recalled her abominable words against her innocent brother-in-law and feared that Rama, hearing of them, had turned away from her. But she never knew that those words had not travelled beyond Lakshmana’s heart.
Like Lord Shiva who swallowed poison to preserve the world, Lakshmana swallowed pain to preserve peace. He chose silence, not because he was weak, but because he valued harmony more than vindication.
In life too, there are moments when words are better swallowed, faults better overlooked, and forgiveness a greater act than correction.
Thiruvalluvar calls such restraint ‘ perumai’ — greatness.
For true greatness is not in catching another’s slip, but in having the grace to let it pass.
Motivational speaker, author and diversity champion Bharathi Bhaskar explores the masterpiece.
For some, fault-finding is not an occasional lapse, it is a way of life. They thrive on pointing fingers, for criticism offers a fleeting sense of control , a feeling of superiority that conceals inner insecurity.
We often speak of Type A and Type B personalities. Type A is the perfectionist, structured, driven, precise. Type B flows with life, flexible, unhurried. To be a Type A person is not your choice, it is how you are made. Yet even for those who notice every flaw , there is a choice in how you point it out.
I learned about this when I was part of the organizing committee of a ten-day workshop. Each day brought new participants and speakers. Amid the bustle, name tags were sometimes printed wrong. My friends and I devised what we called the ‘name tag test’ .
When a name tag was incorrect, some smiled and said, “Not a problem.” There are others who would be wild. One such looked at us frostily and said, “You should be more careful. My name is Sri Priya , not Shri Priya. ”
There are ‘correctors’ all around us. We sometimes learn from them, but often their intent is not to help, but to savour the small thrill of superiority that comes from finding an error.
It reminded me of a meme. The devil was showing a newcomer to hell, the lake of fire and said, “This is the lava you’ll be spending eternity in.”
The newcomer corrected him: “It’s magma. Lava is molten rock that erupted on the earth’s surface, magma is beneath it. We’re underground, so it’s magma.”
The devil sighed, “This is why you’re here, you realize?”
Correct a mistake, if you must. But be gentle. Instead of telling people they were wrong, Greek philosopher Socrates asked questions that led them to realize it themselves. This Socratic method preserved dignity while revealing truth.
Thiruvalluvar, who lived perhaps around the same time, offered something even nobler:
“ Atram maraikkum perumai; sirumaidhan
kutrame koori vidum.”
The great overlook the faults of others; the
Petty delight in pointing them out.
This truth echoes in our epics too. One episode from Kambaramayanam still melts my heart.
At Sita’s insistence, Rama sets out to capture the magical golden deer, despite Lakshmana’s warning. When the demon, disguised as the deer, falls to Rama’s arrow, it screams in Rama’s voice, “Hey Lakshmana! Hey Sita!”
Terrified, Sita pleads with her brother-in-law to go save Rama. Lakshmana refuses to leave her alone. In her panic, Sita loses reason and utters something unthinkable: “Your brother is in danger, and you still wish to remain here by my side?”
When Rama had slain the deer and saw Lakshmana, he asked why Sita was left alone. Lakshmana did not speak of the cruel words hurled at him by the very person he revered as a mother. He merely bowed his head and said softly that Sita was terrified, and so he came.
Not once did he speak of her accusation. The words that had wounded him so deeply remained buried within him, sealed by affection and restraint.
Later, when Sita sat imprisoned in Lanka, she wept in remorse. She recalled her abominable words against her innocent brother-in-law and feared that Rama, hearing of them, had turned away from her. But she never knew that those words had not travelled beyond Lakshmana’s heart.
Like Lord Shiva who swallowed poison to preserve the world, Lakshmana swallowed pain to preserve peace. He chose silence, not because he was weak, but because he valued harmony more than vindication.
In life too, there are moments when words are better swallowed, faults better overlooked, and forgiveness a greater act than correction.
Thiruvalluvar calls such restraint ‘ perumai’ — greatness.
For true greatness is not in catching another’s slip, but in having the grace to let it pass.
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